When Does the Role of Presenter, Moderator, or Host Begin?

One of our kids’ favorite soccer coaches, Coach Erick, used to say, “I won the parking lot!” I asked what he meant by that and he said that he always parks in front of the other coach’s car. He knew that the game began in the parking lot, if only psychologically. And that psychological “win” set the stage for the game itself. He was in his role as coach from the moment he pulled his car into the lot.

When does an event begin? When are we officially in the public role? We are relaxed, alert, and waiting (RAW from the Nia Technique) well before we encounter another person involved with the event.

I remind my clients that their performance, also, starts in the parking lot. When we are presenting or hosting an event, the minute we step foot outside of our cars, the performance has begun. It is likely we will run into an attendee, see the board member who brought us in, have the PR folks snap a photo. So best to take that nice, calming breath before we open the car door.

If we do not accept that our performance starts much earlier than the actual presentation, we risk being ambushed, side-swiped, caught off guard, our nerves jangled; we are not fully prepared. However, when we accept and expect this, we can make adjustments.

This week, for instance, I gave a talk. I’d already been to the space and met with the organizer. The morning of the event, I prepped my materials, packed a large water bottle, dressed, and warmed up at home. I got there an hour early to walk the space, shift the chairs and tables, check the tech, make the space my own, then warmed up again in a storage room. I followed the 24 hour rule: no changes to the content 24 hours before an event. By the time the first attendee arrived, my only job was to breathe, enjoy the company, and remember my intention.

I was in a the role of presenter long before the presentation began. That role allowed me to be present, welcome friends and strangers, listen to their tales, and know that I was ready at any moment to begin my formal presentation.

Think of a cocktail party fundraiser: All of the preparation is done by the time the host opens the door or the first guest arrives. Our chit chat before the official talk is just as important as the talk itself. It is part of relationship-building that undergirds fundraising.

Think of leading a staff retreat: All of the preparation is done well before the staff arrive so we can greet them in the role of host.

Think of running a conference. Our role has begun long before we officially welcome the group. It began the minute our eyes meet another person involved in any way in the event from the tech crew and hotel staff, to the CEO.

Think of moderating a panel: Our role begins well before we step onto the stage. We might be called upon to introduce the panelists, calm any nerves, hold the space so others can shine.

This is not to say there are no breaks—in order to be ON, we have to take good care of ourselves, know our limits and respect them. If we are in a hotel for a conference, take breaks to be alone, lay down for a few minutes, relax and rehydrate. I can always find an empty hallway or bathroom to sit alone and breathe. I’ve even gone back into my car in a snow storm to warm up between the greetings and my formal presentation!

This week, we think ahead to any upcoming events and plan to be fully present and in our role well before we engage with others.

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The ROLES we play: from colleague to parent, from leader to coach

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Extreme Preparation: from what to say to what to wear and everything in-between