BeHolding: How to Facilitate

Whether emceeing, moderating, convening, training, or leading, a great facilitator is almost invisible. The project, training, or meeting seems to bloom right before us spontaneously. The facilitator creates and holds the space for other people and ideas to flourish while completing the agenda on time. Miraculous. It’s almost like a soft wind: invisible yet powerful; containing, shifting, buoying, orchestrating.

A great facilitator exemplifies “expression in service of…”

A great facilitator knows when to let go of any goals in favor of a more pressing issue: they read the room, know the greater context, and can see when something isn’t working.

I think of this as “BeHolding.” We, as facilitators, HOLD the space as we BEhold what is taking place. Our attention is rapt; we notice every dynamic and emotion while keeping track of time and agendas. It’s a lot. And it’s an ever-rewarding experience to see what emerges.

Aside from practice and experience, there are many things we can do to become great facilitators.

We start with preparation well in advance of the event.

EXTREME PREPARATION

• Research:

  • The participants, the event, the venue, the space, the staff.

• Purpose

  • What is the purpose, the greatest possible outcome, for the event?

• Craft the text for:

  • Introductions, interstitial comments, welcomes, questions.

• Anticipate any pushback, resistance, rabbit holes.

  • Best to face the worst in advance so we can think through how best to respond.

• Expectations:

  • Communicate to all involved well in advance with an agenda, time limits, questions they’ll be expected to answer, purpose of the event.

  • Have clarity about goals and outcomes. Is this a brainstorming session or a planning meeting? Each demands a completely different frame of mind and, as a facilitator, we create that mind-set.

• Ask for:

  • Someone to introduce us if needed. If we are introducing the day, craft our tiny intro (people can google us if they want more).

  • Mic preference.

  • Podium preference (mine is always NO podium if possible).

  • Someone else to keep time, if moderating a panel. This may not be possible, but it really frees up the facilitator to have a partner in the front row holding up signs with timing.

  • We may not get what we want, but best to ask.

• Practice:

  • Set up a space similar to the event space and run all content as we would actually do it during the event. Stand if we would stand, sit if we will be sitting. Hold something like a pen if we will be holding a mic or clicker. Do this once a day until 24 hours before the event.

DAY OF THE EVENT

• Space

  • Arrive early to walk the space. Explore. Sit in the back of audience to get a sense of the sight-lines and the distance.

  • Set up the space:

    • Make friends with the staff. They know everything and have our backs. Ask for their help.

    • Are the chairs too far from each other? Scooch them closer.

    • Is there a column hiding people’s view? Move the tables or chairs to make sure all can see.

    • Is there a podium we do not want to use? Remove it.

    • Have we been promised a lapel mic and we only see a hand-held? Ask the staff.

  • Find a place to warm up, breathe, collect ourselves.

• Bring:

  • Water.

  • Watch or some way to keep time. Is there a big clock in the room?

  • Any materials, slides, thumb-drives.

• Remember, the event begins the moment we step out of the car or the elevator.

DURING THE EVENT

We are sharing the stage, so keep our focus on whoever is speaking like a spotlight.

Keep our ears and eyes open to the reality of what is going on. Years ago my father was moderating a panel of Nobel Laureates at Arcosanti in a huge tent. It was hot and late. The audience was disconnected even hearing the most interesting people in the world speak. Dad looked down from the stage and stopped the show. He had the guests move into the audience, he had the audience join them in a circle, and they had a thrilling conversation.

• Keep our eyes, ears, senses, aware. Pay attention.

• Remember the magic of Yes, and…

• Breathe to be present.

• Watch the clock.

• If things derail or there is a rabbit hole, use Yes/No/Yes.

• Watch for defensiveness in ourselves and others.

• Emotions are fine, as long as we manage them in ourselves and others