Go Slow to Go Fast
It may sound counter-intuitive, but as communicators, we must go slow to go fast. As a speed-speaker, I can attest that when I speak quickly, my audience is lost. When I breathe and scaffold my communication, the audience comes with me.
Many things contribute to my hare-like tempo: anxiety, an internal sense that I should hurry up to make space for others, and the disconnection from my audience that results. Admittedly Type A, I like to check things off of my list, get this conversation or talk over with. Talking without stopping is also correlated with domineering—not leaving space for others, controlling the interaction.
But of course, if the purpose of communication is to have an impact, to create relationship, to share, then simply skipping through those precious moments without connection is a waste of everyone’s time. We leave our audience baffled and bored.
So how do we slow down?
The breath is core. When we breathe, the audience breathes. When we breathe, we ground ourselves and others. When we breathe, we pause. When we breathe, we create space for thought and connection. When we breathe, we calm ourselves and others. When we breathe, we create a scaffold to the next thought.
Savor this precious moment. Relish every second.
To make sure that we do not default to an habitual intention, we consciously choose an intention that is: active, positive, juicy, and includes the audience. So rather than “to get it over with,” we might choose, “to connect,” “ to celebrate,” “to enliven.”
Mantra
I also use a simple phrase to remind me to connect. I ask myself throughout a talk, training, or conversation: “Are they with me? Are they with me? Are they with me?”
This keeps me focused on the audience, the other, and their reactions. I know I am going too fast if they are disconnected, expressionless, or worse, looking at a phone!
This week, if we find ourselves speeding ahead, be the tortoise: breathe, connect, read the audience.