“The first way, the last way, the never-failing way to develop self-confidence in speaking is…to speak.  Really, the whole matter finally simmers down but one essential: practice, practice, practice.”

--Dale Carnegie, Public Speaking for Success.

We often use the term ‘confidence’ to paint a wide swath, as in, “she is so confident,” “they exude confidence,” “I need to build my confidence.” What I love about the quote above from Dale Carnegie is that he reminds us that we build confidence in one area at a time and that all it takes is practice. This idea that someone just has confidence or lacks confidence is misleading. We can be a confident skateboarder and lack confidence in skiing. We can have confidence in our ability to make friends and lack confidence in our ability to negotiate a contract. We can be confident in the classroom and lack confidence in the court of law.

In communication, we count on repetition: we say ‘yes’ to every opportunity and rehearse like mad. We rack up experience and…Read on.

Last week we talked about having the courage to ask the hard questions, questions that may make us vulnerable, but which may open up new possibilities and opportunities. This week, we are the person being asked. This week, we need the courage to listen.

The first and most important thing to do is to...Read on.

Generation Z has taught me the beautiful acceptance of making a mistake and taking responsibility in the simple phrase, “My bad!”

“My bad!” is often thrown off in a casual and light way. It means, “I made a mistake. I take responsibility.”

Growing up I internalized the message that making mistakes was shameful. Working in the theater demanded that I let go of this message and embrace messing up, without being derailed. I learned that striving for perfection only serves to block creativity.

AND, I still feel a twinge of shame and fear when I make a mistake. I can get defensive and rigid instead of being fluid. How I wish I had the good-natured acceptance I see in teens to acknowledge …read on for more on integrating mistakes…

In the wonderful Ken Burns documentary, Jazz, Albert Murray says that Duke Ellington had an “experimental disposition.” That phrase caught me. I paused the screen, startled. I want that! How does one cultivate an experimental disposition? How does one approach everyday events and tasks as if we are inventing them in the moment, so that everything feels alive, new, fresh, unexpected? This week, let’s cultivate an experimental disposition by consciously inviting in the unknown. Read on to hear how composers and scientist beckon the “cloud.”