“To be truly effective, you must speak with such intensified and exalted naturalness that your auditors will never dream that you have been trained.”

--Dale Carnegie

Many people believe that authenticity involves complete transparency, blunt honesty, and talking about our wayward bodily functions in public. This nightmarish stream-of-consciousness behavior is not only destructive for the speaker, but the listeners may never recover. No, that is not authenticity. Authentic communication includes awareness of the other person and awareness of our own impact.

And though I agree with much of what Adam Grant writes, I disagree with his definition that: “Authenticity means erasing the gap between what you firmly believe inside and what you reveal to the outside world” (New York Times June 4th 2016). I also disagree with the idea that “being yourself” is the same thing as being authentic. I would call that inappropriate sharing, not reading the room, and putting our own personal needs over the needs of others.  Great communicators know the difference.

Then what IS authenticity?…Read on.