Freeing the Voice from Habit: Filler Words

Um…So! I wanted to talk about, you know, like filler words, like “like.” And, “um.”

Filler words are really OK! We all use filler words when we are speaking unless we are reading from a text or have memorized a monologue. The problem arises when they dominate our speech. We might find ourselves using filler words more frequently when we are nervous, when we have not prepared, and out of habit.

Filler words can be actual words or just sounds that we use to fill a space when we might otherwise be thinking or breathing or just silent.

• Common sounds: um, uh.

• Common words: like, so, anyway, yeah, you know.

When we use words to fill the space, they are void of their meaning and definition. “Like” does not mean, “to have affection for,” or “is similar to.” “You know,” is not making a statement about someone’s knowledge.

Filler words I most often hear are:

• “So,” to start any story, statement, speech, or answer. “So” is often the first words out of someone’s mouth.

• “Like” is a word I hear taking over our language. We hear it as a filler word sprinkled liberally throughout sentences.

First, we become aware: Are we using filler words frequently? Then, we practice breathing in that space, rather than uttering any word or sound. I know that we are afraid of silence. For some reason, we feel compelled to create a wall of sound. It’s really OK to think, to speak with attention to the language, to let each word land, to breathe.

At first, it may feel that we are speaking more slowly. And we might worry that people will get bored, or think we’re dumb, or will jump in when we’re not finished. These anxieties drive a lot of our vocal habits. In fact, the number of meaningful words per minute is the same, but the pace can slow down because we are not stuffing in the empty filler words.

This week, we practice becoming aware of our use of filler words and sounds. Then, we allow for silence and breath in those moments.

Here is a video of me illustrating the above.